{"id":17826,"date":"2024-01-29T07:16:00","date_gmt":"2024-01-29T15:16:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/cms.helloklarity.com\/?p=17826"},"modified":"2024-02-16T05:13:28","modified_gmt":"2024-02-16T13:13:28","slug":"signs-of-a-bad-therapist","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cms.helloklarity.com\/post\/signs-of-a-bad-therapist\/","title":{"rendered":"Signs of a bad therapist: what you need to know"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

When looking for mental health support, it\u2019s just as important to be aware of the signs of a bad therapist as it is to know the signs of a good one. Although therapy has many evidence-based benefits<\/a>, a bad therapist can spoil your therapy experience and discourage you from continuing with treatment. It\u2019s important to know how to find a good therapist and avoid the bad apples.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So what makes a bad therapist? In this article, we go over 20 signs of a bad therapist, as well as the signs of a good<\/em> therapist and how to search for a therapist who meets your needs.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What are the signs of a bad therapist?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Few therapists are truly \u201cbad\u201d \u2014 but, like in any profession, bad eggs do exist. When we talk about a \u201cbad\u201d therapist, we\u2019re referring to therapists who break their code of ethics and engage in unethical, exploitative, or abusive behaviors. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

These 20 signs of a bad therapist are never acceptable behaviors, and it\u2019s important to take action to protect yourself as soon as possible if you come across any of them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They try to engage in a sexual or romantic relationship with you<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

One of the most harmful unethical behaviors that a therapist can engage in is to engage in a romantic or sexual relationship with you. This is explicitly against any therapist\u2019s code of ethics and is an exploitation of the inherent power they have over you as your treatment provider. Because of this power, these relationships can never be consensual.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Under no<\/em> circumstance should a therapist or mental health provider ever speak to you or touch you in a sexually suggestive way. Even if you express sexual attraction toward your therapist, they should never reciprocate \u2014 they should talk to you about it in a professional manner.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They don\u2019t respect your confidentiality<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Another essential ethical boundary that all therapists must heed is that of confidentiality. Confidentiality means protecting your right to privacy as well as taking measures to protect your health information. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Your right to confidentiality is protected<\/a> by The Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act (HIPAA). There are some exceptions; therapists have a duty to break confidentiality if they think you\u2019re a danger to yourself or others, or when they have knowledge or suspicions of child or elder abuse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you think your therapist may be breaking your right to confidentiality \u2014 for example, if you see them out in public and they introduce you as their client, or they tell your family members what you\u2019ve talked about in sessions without your written consent \u2014 this is a big red flag that you should immediately report to your state\u2019s licensing board.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They share too many personal details<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Self-disclosure is when the therapist shares information about themselves in session. Most therapists practice self-disclosure to a certain extent \u2014 for example, you may know that your therapist has children or even that they have been through some similar experiences as you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

However, all of a therapist\u2019s self-disclosure should be to help you<\/em> in the therapeutic process. If you feel like your therapist talks about themselves too much, or if they share details about their personal life that make you feel uncomfortable, this is inappropriate and a sign of a bad therapist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They don\u2019t respect your time<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

This is a tricky one, and some people may be more sensitive than others to tardiness and time issues. But you\u2019re paying for a therapeutic intervention, and your time deserves respect. If your therapist consistently disrespects your time by starting sessions late or cutting sessions short early,  it\u2019s a sign you\u2019re dealing with a bad therapist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Of course, therapists are human and it\u2019s understandable to have emergencies sometimes that cause tardiness or last-minute cancellations\u2014 but if this is happening repeatedly and you feel like your therapist doesn\u2019t respect your time, it may be time to move on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They have poor boundaries<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Therapists should always respect your boundaries and understand that a therapeutic relationship isn\u2019t the same as a friendship. That doesn\u2019t mean they shouldn\u2019t be friendly, and you need to build a great amount of trust with them for therapy to be effective. But they should always respect your boundaries.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Poor boundaries can show up in many ways, the most extreme demonstration being a sexual relationship between therapist and client. But even if it doesn\u2019t get that far, pay attention to displays of poor boundaries \u2014 like sharing too many personal details about their life, calling you at inappropriate times, coming to your home, or being overly invested in your life (for example, telling you that they couldn\u2019t sleep because they were so worried about you).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They have an expired or suspended license<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

This one is a big one. To provide therapy, someone must have an active license (or be gaining clinical hours toward licensure and working under the supervision of a licensed practitioner). Practicing without a license \u2014 whether the therapist never had a license, their license expired, or their license was suspended or revoked \u2014 isn\u2019t only unethical, it\u2019s illegal.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you\u2019re concerned about your therapist\u2019s license, you can verify it on the appropriate state licensing board. Find out the type of license your therapist claims to have, and their license number. Many states have a mental health regulatory agency that can verify your therapist\u2019s license. If not, then check with the state\u2019s licensing board.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They don\u2019t provide informed consent<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Informed consent is about making sure that you\u2019re educated about any treatments that the therapist will deliver, and that you consent to receiving them. Informed consent usually happens in the first session \u2014 your therapist may explain to you how therapy works as well as your right to confidentiality (and its exceptions).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Your therapist shouldn\u2019t provide any treatments that you haven\u2019t consented to. For example, it is unethical for your therapist to start Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy <\/a>without explaining the process and how it works and getting your explicit consent. Similarly, it\u2019s unethical for a therapist to hand you a prescription, for example, Zoloft for anxiety<\/a>, without discussing it with you first. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

They engage in illegal behavior<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Another sign of a bad therapist is engaging in illegal behavior, even if the behavior doesn\u2019t affect you directly. For example, if you find out that our therapist commits tax fraud, it\u2019s a big red flag. The exception to this may be if they have broken the law to uphold their ethics \u2014 for example, if they\u2019ve been arrested for advocating for human rights.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They use methods that have been proven to be harmful or ineffective<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Unfortunately, some therapists still practice therapy methods that have been proven by research to be ineffective at best, and harmful at worst. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

A common example of this is conversion \u201ctherapy\u201d for people in the LGBTQ+ community. Research clearly shows that not only is conversion therapy ineffective for changing people\u2019s sexual identity (which is an unethical goal in itself) but is also very harmful to their mental health, and is known to increase rates of suicide.<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Any therapist who uses outdated types of therapy methods is engaging in unethical and dangerous behavior.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They hold racist or discriminatory views<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

This should go without saying, but any therapist who holds racist, homophobic, misogynistic, or otherwise discriminatory views is a bad therapist \u2014 whether or not they talk about those views with you in sessions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mental health providers value the inherent worth of all human beings. If they hold these views, then they aren\u2019t respecting this core professional value. This is unethical for a therapist, and any therapist who holds these views needs to be kicked to the curb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They minimize your struggles<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Your therapist should make you feel heard, understood, and valued. Therapists who judge you, belittle you, or minimize what you\u2019re going through aren\u2019t good therapists. Watch out for therapists who compare your struggles to others\u2019 worse experiences, saying things like, \u201cAt least you haven\u2019t gone through\u2026,\u201d or \u201cJust be grateful that you\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Keep in mind that part of a therapist\u2019s job, especially if they use cognitive-behavioral techniques<\/a>, is to help you challenge your own perception of events. Trying to help you challenge your own negative thoughts isn\u2019t the same as minimizing your experiences.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They make false promises<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Mental health conditions, like depression and anxiety, are chronic, which means there\u2019s no cure for them. Therapy helps you learn how to manage the symptoms and live as well as possible. Your therapists shouldn\u2019t make false guarantees about recovery. It\u2019s a particular red flag if they refer to the treatment they provide as a \u201ccure\u201d for your mental health problems.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If a therapist is promoting a treatment as a \u201ccure\u201d or making other false promises or guarantees about recovery or recovery timelines, then it might be \u201csnake oil\u201d being offered by a bad therapist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They\u2019re often distracted during sessions<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Your therapy session is about you<\/em>. You deserve to have your therapist\u2019s full attention during the time you\u2019re paying them for mental health support. One sign of a bad therapist is being distracted during sessions \u2014 for example, looking at their phone, stopping to take a call, or constantly checking the clock. You wouldn\u2019t appreciate this behavior from anyone, and it\u2019s not okay when a therapist does it, either.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They impose their religious or spiritual beliefs on you<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Many therapists offer faith-based therapy if you belong to a particular religion and are looking for spiritual guidance. But you may share the same religion as your therapist, or may not be religious at all. Many people simply don\u2019t want to mix their therapy sessions with their religion.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s okay for your therapist to be religious, but if they try to talk to you about religion or push their beliefs on you without your invitation \u2014 it\u2019s a red flag.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They pressure you into things you aren\u2019t ready for<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Therapists should never pressure you. This includes pressuring you to open up about something you don\u2019t want to talk about or taking some sort of action in your life, like leaving a relationship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Most therapists encourage you to take steps toward your goals, even when they\u2019re scary. For example, they may encourage you to expose yourself to your fears or encourage you to talk to your partner about something important. But they should never pressure or try to force you when you have stated that you aren\u2019t ready.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They rush a diagnosis<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

A thorough psychological evaluation takes time. If your therapist or psychiatrist jumps to a diagnosis within a few minutes of meeting you, they could be a bad therapist. Unfortunately, misdiagnosis is common; this is a critical problem because to receive the right mental health treatment, you need the right diagnosis. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you don\u2019t feel like the therapist spent enough time with you before giving you a diagnosis, you may be seeing a bad therapist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They aren\u2019t open to feedback<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Good therapists invite and listen to feedback. If your therapist isn\u2019t willing to accept feedback from you about their services \u2014 if they get angry and defensive when you provide feedback \u2014 it may be a sign that they\u2019re a bad therapist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They argue or get into power struggles with you<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Your therapist should never become argumentative with you. They may encourage you to change your perspective about something, but it\u2019s not about \u201cwinning\u201d an argument \u2014 it\u2019s about helping you<\/em>. If sessions start feeling like a power struggle, it\u2019s time to get out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They don\u2019t respect your expertise<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Every person is an expert on their own lives. You know yourself best \u2014 you know about your past experiences and what your symptoms feel like firsthand. You know what\u2019s worked for you, what hasn\u2019t, and why. Of course, your therapist brings their own mental health expertise to the table, too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But your therapist should never make you feel like your expertise and knowledge about yourself and your experiences don\u2019t matter. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Good therapy is about forming a collaborative relationship where your expertise is also respected.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They lie about their experience and knowledge<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s okay for therapists to have different areas of expertise. For example, some therapists may specialize in treating obsessive-compulsive disorder<\/a>, while others work with people who have ADHD<\/a>. However, a therapist should never lie about what they\u2019re experienced in treating. If your therapist misguides you to believe they\u2019re knowledgeable in an area they\u2019re not, it\u2019s time to move on. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Different mental health conditions require different expertise, and it\u2019s important to find a therapist who\u2019s experienced in working with people going through similar experiences. Ask potential therapists about their training and experience to ensure that they\u2019re knowledgeable in treating your issue(s).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What makes for a bad fit between therapist and client?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Sometimes a therapist isn\u2019t \u201cbad\u201d at all, but still not a good fit for you<\/em>. In general, it\u2019s recommended that you see a therapist 3 or 4 times before deciding if they\u2019re a good fit. That\u2019s because it usually takes a few sessions to start building rapport in the therapeutic relationship. You might feel a little awkward during the first visit, but start to feel more comfortable as sessions continue.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you still feel like it\u2019s a bad fit after a few sessions, let the therapist know and look for another therapist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Some signs your therapist isn\u2019t a good fit for you (even though they may be a good therapist) include:<\/p>\n\n\n\n